Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Money Matters

Dude if you wanna spend it, you need to earn it!You hear it all your teenage life from your harried parents and take it in your stride, but it hurts a little when it comes from your spouse. Though I have been big on spending all my life, earning the dough doesn't come easy to me. I wonder why? Am I not a go-getter enough, or am I complacent with the spouse doing the needful. The grad fellowship in the US for 2 years was the only high point in my otherwise sorry monetary life.Even though it was not a big amount in itself, it did pay for my high-end laptop, camera etc in the first couple of months. And I left it all to come to the uncertainties of life in India during the recession. With double MS degrees, I hoped landing a great job would just be a matter of time, but I am still waiting for that elusive offer.
Sometimes I wonder what if I had stayed back and let life take its own course. I would be earning decent moolah and looking forward to advancements in my career. However I am not so sure about my personal life. A long distance relationship was just not our thing is what we decided and after a long struggle of the spouse trying to make it there, I decided to pack my bags and move back. All good. But really?
When money was not a problem, lack of proximity was and now it is just the opposite. The either/ors in life have me flummoxed. Just for once can I not have it all and sleep in peace.

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